An Open letter to Susan Patton

Charmaine L. Age 15, Chinese International School

An Open letter to Susan Patton

Dear Ms. Patton,

I don’t agree with the advice you’ve given to the young women of Princeton. Although they are college students and are practically grown up, they shouldn’t go to college just to ‘land’ the perfect spouse.

No doubt finding a husband on campus before you graduate can increase your chances, but it can also decrease your chances of getting a better job because your relationship affected your education. Princeton is such a good university and you should be maximizing your time on education than on a relationship. (Read Kelly Yang's opinion here!)

Aside from having a better future, education is the one thing that cannot be stolen from you. As Julia Shaw said, “men die, but your college degree is forever.” Education allows the possibility of more job opportunities and if you get a high paying job, you will be more financially secure. You also mentioned that the young women should ‘land’ a man who is intellectually equal or above you, but truth be told, not everyone in Princeton or any good university are obligated to be smart. There can be a lot of men, who are intellectually equal to you all around the world, so why waste your time on choosing the perfect one in college? Can’t men from your company in the future be as smart as you? Plus, the bonus side of this is that they are financially stable and they’ll know how to deal with the trials of the real world.

Some say that if you don’t get married at a young age, your chances will decrease and you may be labeled as a ‘left-over’ or considered ‘forever alone’. No one will take care of you when you get older and become your safety net. You will not have a spouse to share your joy with a new generation. I guess you can probably juggle both, education and relationship, but it would add onto the pre-existing stress you already have. To be honest, it’s hard to find a balance between your education and your relationship. If you are married when you’re in college, I don’t think you are intellectually experienced enough to handle your relationship and your education. A research in University of Pennsylvania stated that many students aren’t ready to settle down and be in a serious relationship. I guess they may classify settling down or being in a relationship a distraction and a burden.

In conclusion, I don’t think finding a husband on campus before you graduate is a good advice. If you want a successful future, you should spend your time in school and concentrate on your education. Knowledge is the most important thing and it will stay with you forever. Finding the perfect spouse can be postponed and I’m sure you can find the perfect partner with 7 billion people in the world.

Sincerely,

Charmaine